The shiny luster of new appliances and sparkly granite tops is enough to blind a family into believing that a remodel won’t be all that bad. Much like labor and delivery, however, the process that you go through in hopes of achieving a wrapped-up-bundle-of-goodness is, in fact, all that bad. Disclaimer: I could easily insert #firstworldproblem between every single word of this post, so take it for what it is… A stressed out mama who is using her blog to vent. Read on if you dare.
1. “Messy” Is An Understatement
Sure, there will be dust. And obviously, there will be debris. But messy isn’t a word that can be used to describe a proper remodel. Tragic surroundings, devastating atmosphere, and a category 5 natural disaster come closer, but even those are far off from reality. And it isn’t just the immediate area of remodeling like you might imagine. No, no, no. All surrounding areas suffer the casualty of close proximity. Dust snakes its’ way under doors and through duct work like the magic pixie dust you expected to sprinkle and have your new space appear without a headache.
2. Electrical Outage. Take 74
If you enjoy playing Russian roulette with your child’s screen time during a rain storm when you’re confined to the ONE room of the house that isn’t covered with construction workers and ladders, then a remodel is right up your alley. Even when you don’t expect it, there will be no lights. Even on days when there isn’t electrical work being done, you will lose power. Grab a flashlight and dig out the board games, because you’ll need both. While you’re at it, put your Moscato in a cooler full of ice just to be safe. Because although you can live without tv, and you can get by without Internet, drinking warm white wine just might push you over the edge.
3. What’s For Dinner?
Ya know what’s not for dinner? Meal planning. Do you have chicken tacos cooking in the crock pot? Too bad the electricity was tripped. Again. What’s that? You have a lunchtime meat and cheese platter made up and ready in the fridge because you’re SO good at planning ahead and you know your kids will eat it? Well isn’t that too bad that the contractor has the fridge jammed shut to avoid splatter and you have no access to the one part of the day that you thought would be cloaked in success. Here’s the best way to plan meals during the intense part of your kitchen remodel: Plan on calling your Plan D into action. Every night. Except for the really bad nights, and then you’re onto Plan E.
4. Sticking To Budget. And by Budget, we Mean 5-10K More Than You Expected. At least.
If you are in the midst of a remodel, I will assume that it is because your house is 1.) Suffering from poor craftsmanship and years of abuse or 2.) Dated (which is a passive aggressive way of saying UGLY). The walls separating the dinette rocked in the ’70’s but are taboo in today’s quest for an open floor plan. Hey, cupboards, 1992 called and they want their golden oak finish back. Whatever your original plans, whatever your original budget, know that there will likely need to be concessions made on your part. Even if working with the best contractor and after lining up budget-friendly services, things will come up. When you try to replace your chandelier, you may discover your entire house is wired is equipped with aluminum wiring instead of the status quo copper. Then, just as your left arm turns into a human slot machine that your contractor keeps pulling, you discover there has been an unrepaired leak in the floor. It has been hidden nicely under your previous tile, but now that it has been exposed for the cold-hearted killer that it is, new floorboards and padding are yours. YIPPEE.
5. Fighting with Your Significant Other is Imminent
It’s all fun and games until the dishwasher you spent months selecting is back ordered and your backup option has risen in price by $400. Regardless of the fact that it’s the universe’s way of getting back at you for poor choices in your early 20’s, you will need someone to blame. And you’ll look across the dusty debris, flare your nostrils, and let a month’s worth of pent up anger at your contractor come rolling out like a bowling ball down a lane slicked with cooking oil.
When it is all said and done, at least I came through on my promise to make all of my current “life problems” fall under the hashtag of #firstworldproblem. Told ya.
Are you currently in the midst of a remodel? No matter how big or small, I’d love to hear about it! Specifically, what is driving you crazy about your remodel??